stuff i've found interesting in the past week
1) dresses at the oscars are really ugly and unflattering. the oscars have probably the highest concentration of beautiful people in one place, yet that's the night hollywood starlets apparently decide they're tired of looking amazing. this is unacceptable to those of us who don't have the opportunity to have someone custom-design a dress for us and do our make-up and hair.
*to gorgeous actresses* listen you ridiculously stunning women, more power to you if you want to wear a unique dress to the oscars. i commend originality. but don't forget one of the fundamentals of being a popular hollywood actress--looking way better than all of us.* instead of wearing a dress made of shag carpet and strands of cabbage patch doll hair, perhaps try something in a nice chiffon. also, it doesn't hurt to consider the color of your skin before picking out a dress so you avoid looking either dead, frozen or jaundiced. finally, one thing i'll never understand is how some of these dresses make you size-negative-one women look fat. for one, how is that possible? secondly, why would you want that? whether you're trying to "look more normal" or "pretend you're pregnant" or "pretend you're not pregnant," it's not flattering, so knock it off. but if you really want to look more normal, eat some pizza.**
2) keith olbermann types like a freak. if you don't know who keith olbermann is, he's the awesome host of countdown on msnbc. there was a story about him this weekend and they showed a clip of him typing a story. basically his left index finger only hits the space bar, and his right index finger performs the hunt-and-peck method, minus the hunting. he doesn't look down while he's typing and he's really fast at it. i wonder how many words he types a minute.
3) i really don't like mob shows. i happened to catch that new show on nbc monday night called the black donnellys and despite the beautiful cinematography, excellent acting and great music, i got completely annoyed. mobs seem so idiotic to me. here's a typical mob scenario: father from family "a" gets killed by mob guy "b," friend of father from family "a" (aka. father from family "c") beats the shit out of mob guy "b," friend of mob guy "b" (aka. mob guy "d") kills father from family "c," father from family "c"'s son (aka. johnny***) always wanted to avoid mob activities but is now pulled into the scene by having to avenge his father's death. then more death, more ass kicking, more shootings, more of nothing getting accomplished, everyone dies, the end.
*in fact, we pay you to.
**according to g-spice.
***cause there's always a kid named johnny in mob movies or shows
*to gorgeous actresses* listen you ridiculously stunning women, more power to you if you want to wear a unique dress to the oscars. i commend originality. but don't forget one of the fundamentals of being a popular hollywood actress--looking way better than all of us.* instead of wearing a dress made of shag carpet and strands of cabbage patch doll hair, perhaps try something in a nice chiffon. also, it doesn't hurt to consider the color of your skin before picking out a dress so you avoid looking either dead, frozen or jaundiced. finally, one thing i'll never understand is how some of these dresses make you size-negative-one women look fat. for one, how is that possible? secondly, why would you want that? whether you're trying to "look more normal" or "pretend you're pregnant" or "pretend you're not pregnant," it's not flattering, so knock it off. but if you really want to look more normal, eat some pizza.**
2) keith olbermann types like a freak. if you don't know who keith olbermann is, he's the awesome host of countdown on msnbc. there was a story about him this weekend and they showed a clip of him typing a story. basically his left index finger only hits the space bar, and his right index finger performs the hunt-and-peck method, minus the hunting. he doesn't look down while he's typing and he's really fast at it. i wonder how many words he types a minute.
3) i really don't like mob shows. i happened to catch that new show on nbc monday night called the black donnellys and despite the beautiful cinematography, excellent acting and great music, i got completely annoyed. mobs seem so idiotic to me. here's a typical mob scenario: father from family "a" gets killed by mob guy "b," friend of father from family "a" (aka. father from family "c") beats the shit out of mob guy "b," friend of mob guy "b" (aka. mob guy "d") kills father from family "c," father from family "c"'s son (aka. johnny***) always wanted to avoid mob activities but is now pulled into the scene by having to avenge his father's death. then more death, more ass kicking, more shootings, more of nothing getting accomplished, everyone dies, the end.
*in fact, we pay you to.
**according to g-spice.
***cause there's always a kid named johnny in mob movies or shows
posted by dub at 4:32 AM
2 Comments:
Isn't it just amazing. I was shocked when the "fashion experts" on Today were raving over Penelope Cruz's gown.
I'm sorry, but all I have to say is "Big Bird called and he wants his dress back."
I think the problem was Scarlett Johannnsseenn wasn't a featured cut away.
(sorry I don't know which letter is actually doubled at the end of her name. We don't talk about spelling...)
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